dude i woke up laying next to some guy. i dont have my bra or his name. he has a nice tv though.
seagrams + popov + pineapple + milk. there, ur search for worlds worst drink is over. you're welcome
She helped me organize my comics and then blew me. This is the one.
He kept singing "who's that peekin in my window" we thought he was high til we realized someone was lookin in the windows.
He was sitting on the bathroom floor, swirling his finger in the toilet singing the Laguna Beach theme song. I don't know whether to laugh or help him.
We had an indepth conversation about his employment at Arbys..
sorry about having a shotput competition with your microwave, seemed like a good idea at the time
Taco Bell drive through. Chick got out of the car in front of us and threw up on the hood of my car!
Not okay.
Just walked into a random hotel for the free breakfast. How was your night?
Apparently you can unlock an iPad by doing a line on the lock screen I'm about to bust that myth
... and smoked a joint with my new landlord. I'm starting to like Germany.
I'm glad you had fun with your genitals.
It's official! Naked girl is back and making stir fry. Still not sure she realizes we can see her whole apartment from our balcony. Cheap beer and a show.
Also, in case they didn’t tell you… there is a chicken living in your old room… so I would assume cleaning that is now on them
Will you come get your son? He's using an old bike pump to help him fart the national anthem...
Randomize
