I wanna do crazy things to you in a tent
fuckk wrong person
.. who was that for? a girlscout?
cant believe you said you would bone perez hilton
i said paris hilton
thats even worse
They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
AHHHH!!! note to self never google image chastity belt omfg
god, a vagina is an amazing trump card
The only thing I can remember you saying is "I won't cut pizza like this when I'm older."
Now that Steinbrenner is in heaven he's going to make Jesus cut his hair
Was just explained ingredients in a four loko. Puzzles of the universe starting to piece together.
Wore last nights jeans to Christmas Dinner with the fam, found a half gram of blow, while they're praying ill be railing.
I just remembered that he had fake blood all over his face last night. I woke up with it all over my dick. He was 50. Please don't judge me.
Please come home, i don't want to feel like basket garbage girl but I'm in your alleyway and not sure how to change that.
You were drinking whiskey from a beer bottle i dont know what you really expected...
all night she kept rolling over and mumbling something about wanting an extendable retractable urethra.
Well, at least you look pretty when you're disgusted
I just found your "it's drinking time" note in my chem notes. Why did this never happen??
I was waiting for you to find it...I'll be over in 5
Randomize
