I really think my ability to vom without making noise mmight be my most useful talent
I'm sweating while I eat mac and cheese. That fat.
he went to find a bathroom and came back 10 minutes later with a fifth of bacardi, a pack of cigarettes, and two funnel cakes. he is a man among boys.
I'm just going to say , cocktail races are not for a Wednesday night maybe not even a Friday type of deal
Tomorrow, you will get a text, and it will bE spelled right, that's me yo, certify ya soon
Sit down my child. It's time you were told of my famous loss-of-virginity story entitled, "The Penis that Never Could."
Its a sick, sad, world when parents get more ass then you.
I know you're gay. But if I'm not getting dick, then you have to. That's what friends do.
Your vase full of piss was still at his house and he still doesn't know.
He's practically not my boyfriend anymore. So let's go get some glitter, balloons, alcohol and forget this night ever happened.
It takes a special friend to go vibrator shopping with
Yes. It does.
I just wanna be able to fart and do my homework but he won't leave
I was totally pumped and so was my beard
I think you might be the first man ever to describe getting a blowjob as "neat"
was that the third sophomore you've banged this week?
third one in three days
Randomize
