Do you know that poor pathetic girl that we should be friends with
I cant. I'm trying to smell my vagina.
When he came he kept saying "oh god oh god" and he sounded just like his dad. awkward...
Judging by the fact that my hair was glued to my head with vomit, yeah I think I couldve used a friend last night
Between cock and motorcycle I'm glad I don't have to sit at work tomorrow
He lectured me about the dangers of drugs while wearing a sombrero and doing interpretive dance.
Operation "Inform her family she stars in a sadistic lesbian porn film" is in full effect. She picked the wrong guy to cheat on.
Im going..... Drinking all day and hand jobs from 18yr old emo rich girls that are just trying to get back at mom and dad for being to protective...SOLD
I can affiliate each flavor of Copenhagen to a different one night stand. I really love Texas.
there is vomit in the pocket of my dress coat. i remember thinking "this is a weird place to puke" at some point in the evening, but i dont understand how i did this.
Landen experienced Greenville for the first time last night. He was awaken by 2 cops and 4 EMS guys this morning in the bed of that truck that is for sale at the swashbuckler carwash, said he was trying to walk to waffle house... Greenville- 1, Landen- 0
He's slurring his text. I didn't think that was possible.
So if I run into you on the street, I'm supposed to just stop drop and suck your dick?
You know that voice that tells you to do something spontaneous after 1am? Don't listen to it.
I haven’t been this excited since I found out they sold cases of Jack Daniels.
Randomize
