Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
guess who just got paired up at the beer pong table with the fat girl who's nipples are hanging out...
I bought the tickets, he brought the weed. thanks to you, we had to roll a joint out of my bible paper.
Just turned rock'em sock'em robots with my little cousin into a drinking game. Im drinking bourbon hes drinking hot chocolate.
I would also like to inform you that I can no longer lay on my back because my tailbone is bruised from the nightstand. Good job.
Please note: when a bouncer tells you to leave, pointing out that their career path makes them a much better judge what to do will not make you friends
ur mom makes the best bacon
WHAT ARE YOU DOING IN MY HOUSE
She judged ME for picking my nose when SHE has the clap.
Today in French class my teacher was singing "what does the fox say" so i started answering in similar satanic ritual noises
He came in two seconds and stole my pizza so I'm not counting it.
I just puke and rallied at my anniversary dinner #winning
That's like a fucking falcon or some shit. I don't know birds but I know that is not a bird you fuck with.
I'm at her wedding and she managed to get every single one night stand I ever had in her wedding party. Why does she hate me?
She swallowed the car key because she thought we were really going to make her drive.
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