just took a sink shower in Arbys bathroom
he invited me to an all week drinking party at his house. apparently he knows the key to my heart is booze shaped.
i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
i was more sad about losing him as neighbor on fishville than as a boyfriend
It just hit me that i made out with someone's mom last night
Just saw the stripper pole on the road that we threw out of the party bus last night
I refuse to apologize. Any dick that comes that close to my face uninvited is gonna get bit
You were sitting on the filthy kitchen floor eating a packet of grated cheese, and you were crying because you couldn't find any cheese.. I'd say our party was a success.
It's amazing I mean I blew that senator just for him to deny me marriage.... Politics suck and he swallowed!
you were stumbling down richmond carrying a girl in a nurse costume. its not even halloween dude
He came up to me looked at my tits said they were huge, rated them a 7 and then asked if girls really do masterbate. To make it better, he put his hand up to my face and said his penis is longer than my face...
They started shooting fireworks out of a dryer. It was my cue to leave.
A girl just invited me over for a blowjob and beer. Is this a trap?
A friendship for the ages born on how horny we both are
I can’t believe I made out with a flat earther and didn’t know about it until now!
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