if you call bong hits and onion rings a party, then yeah
Remember when the only STD we had to worry about were hickies? Those were the days
You realize it's finals week?
Ya that's the school's fault. St. Patrick's day came first.
New scientific discovery: The hypothetical attractiveness of a woman increases exponentially as her skirt:boot ratio approaches zero. Nobel Prize in my future?
Also...you were trying to touch his balls without him noticing
You can't buy drugs with a ziplock bag full of quarters, chuck-e-cheese coins, and a starbucks giftcard.
watch me
Some girl just showed me her stretch marks
You need to get out of tn
KEG. KEG. THE OPERA HAS A KEG. KEG STAND IN A TUX. AFTER PARTY RAVE AND KEG STANDS.
good news: smoking weed at school again, quality of life has improved drastically
Like will they card me for my own whiskey in shampoo bottles?
My card got declined when I tried to buy dippin dots at 2 am, the lady gave them to me for free because "I looked like I needed them."
I stole $10 from the guy I hooked up with last night.Not sure why but it was definitely more satisfying.
On the way to have sex with my ex's roommate... I have hit a new low
he had a bulletproof vest and a pocket full of lollipops! how was i suppose to say no.
He in a way got kinda cockblocked by Jesus
Randomize