I wanna wear you like a flannel shirt
IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
I demanded respect from my fuck buddy. Drunk me is not fun.
He's a cat fanatic .. That was not in the fine print when we started fucking
I walked in on him successfully eating chips and masturbating at the same time. I don't know whether I should be ashamed or proud.
Oh yea... In other news I've decided to get an external hard drive and start getting music from all the guys I'm fucking... Do you think a terabyte would be enough storage space?
I like that you're Jewish, because you can rail me on Christmas Eve and it won't be weird.
I guess I'm open to more types of dick now
Also this is super embarrassing but sorry for licking your chest
Word my sister pulled through for me and brought vodka shooters for the plane. its about to be a sloppy 4 hours
We set around a table in a hotel room and he spoon fed Molly to everyone there... I felt sketch for sec but then... Oh well.
i always handshake my one night stand, im classy like that.
I need to reevaluate my stance on weekday hangovers...
Just taking a shit and realized the captain planet theme song is stuck in my head.
Randomize
