Drunk x Brooklyn = problems getting home. If I don't make it you can have my computer and my bitches. You're welcome.
You know, I really only think drinking is a problem if you're not good at it.
He's at the gym. He likes to get high and swim cause it makes him feel like a fish.
Best friends brother. Beat that.
He got so drunk that he tried hitting on a girl using nothing but his Samuel L. Jackson soundboard application on his Iphone
I made out with Jen. We were naked. I'm still gay. Forever
He won't stop licking me..... im choosing your date next time.
The liquor store manager told us to drink responsible as we checked out and we laughed to his face. Like we're buying karkov at noon, responsibility is out of the question
I'm sorry i ruined our friendship with a boner
The cop asked you if you had been drinking and you said you drank milk out of a cow.
I rememeber. I showed him the picture on my phone of me drinking out of the utter, right?
He was sucking my nipples then stopped, looked me dead in the eyes and said "im gonna cum for my babygirl"
We were licking ciroc off the poker table
I can see the future and your future is full of penis
Very unfortunate to find out the kid who took your virginity has never seen Star Wars🙃
is it still the walk of shame if his dad gave me a 'thanks for sleeping with my son' head nod on my way out this morning?
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