Did you fuck her?
If by "fuck her" you mean "threw up on her shoes," then yes, I achieved that.
Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
This guy legit just tried to LSAT formal logic his way into my pants. Contrapositives and everything.
Apparently I climbed into a dryer last night and refused to leave... There are pictures to prove it
What am I legally allowed to do to a girl that is the equivalent of me punching her in the face?
We are going all out this weekend. My liver is already smiling.
Dude he's your dog he doesn't love me more than you. I'm just like that cool uncle that takes him to burger king and to see girls.
I'm eating a piece of cake like an apple. At least my thought process is healthy.
I may not have eyeballs after all the drunk naked people having sex outside.
Two women at the Safeway just got out of their separate cars and kissed. One was driving an outback, the other a CRV. It was like a Honda and Subaru had a lesbian joint venture and filmed the commercial in front of me.
legit question. can i put a condom down our garbage disposal? my rents are coming over in 20
Best case scenario: sex with hot bartender \nWorst case scenario: no sex and punched by tattooed guy that may or may not be said bartenders boyfriend.
my vagina is like this close to growling at me and leading me onto the nearest dance floor
make it buy you a drink first
Sorry I blacked out in bed
it was real late and you were brushing your teeth with miller light. it was bound to happen.
we were all too drunk to realize that the cat wasnt yours
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