me and ur bf were arguing about whether coke was vegan. i really hope it's vegan
windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
So My parents cut me off after I started making blood marys with hienz ketchup
I blacked out, fell off a swingset, and thought I was Liz Lemon for almost an hour.
does my mom think that having an ed hardy lighter is going to get her laid?
I just woke up and checked my e-mail, and apparently while drunk I bought a blowtorch. Thought you'd want to know.
Are you still giving blowjobs?
Who is this?
i remember introducing him to all my posters and making him be extra nice to frank sinatra and bob dylan before he fucked me
I cleaned out the fridge, had to pound the brews. I am going to be wrecked for my final at 1
there's chocolate cake in my bathtub.. I don't even want to know how the hell chocolate cake wound up in my tub..
I've had to much cheese to give a fuck about anything. im tired.
I did not get laid last night bc my condoms were too small. I'm allowed to be dreary
Oh yeah I remember when I first saw Kyler's balls. If there's anything high school swim prepared me for, it's the amount of testicles I would see here
I just used my citation as a bookmark. Want a beer?
My ex is stopping by while he’s working tonight after delivering a pizza to fuck me, then going back to work at Pizza Hut. This is what my life has become.
Randomize
