Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
I came downstairs to find I had missed the 3some on my kitchen floor but not the pukefest or ER trip after it. This is what happens when the voice of reason is otherwise occupied
My boyfriend just sent me flowers. I am now crying at the fact i fucked my fat neighbor. God please help me.
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
i'm too drunk to leave my room. poked my head out like a turtle and everyone knew i wasn't sober. i like it better in my nonjudgmental turtle shell anyway.
Were going to have to vacuum the bathtub, great party
I got woken up by a construction worker, turns out I was laying in a hallway, naked and wrapped in a matress pad. To answer your question no, I did not study for this test I got David Hasselhoff drunk
Best part of having a window in your office is that you can leave through it when you shit your pants at work.
We should give each other good-luck-on-your-finals head in the morning.
my phone went off during the middle of it and he ask what i was doing. he wouldn't let my reply with "your boss". ..
I jammed my finger giving him a hand job. Don't ask how, I'm still trying to figure that out.
Now that you have a boyfriend, can I have my vibrator back?
I should stop using "Braveheart would do it" as a basis for decision making...
I HATE HIM SO MUCH I HOPE HE GETS IN SOME WEIRD ACCIDENT WHICH MAKES IT IMPOSSIBLE FOR HIM TO NUT
slept at my ex’s house last night and as i was leaving his brother was sitting there on the sofa and said “bet you regret that one don’t ya”
Randomize
