I just saw grafitti that read "Mug The Fart Eater". Really, Memphis? That's all you've got?
just woke up and he was jacking off in the corner.. am i being punked?
I didn't sleep with her. I'm boycotting arizona and she's from phoenix.
Apparently one comment in my womens studies class cockblocks yourself for an entire semester.
The best part is that he made someone stop their workout to take pictures of him, specifically so he could put them on facebook. That is an unparalleled level of douchebaggery.
Dude, I fucked her last night with nothing but my bandana on. Like straight Indian chief style.
I feel like everything I touch in this bar I'm gonna get hepatitis. my kinda joint
don't pay it forward
I eont pay shit forward. told a stranger to call an abulance and peaced
The drunk mom in a firefighter hat just told her to leave.
Just blew a guy who had the same phone case as me. It was destiny.
I was just hotboxing under my sheets and I got lost on the way out.
It was so scary.
Also I'm sorry for asking you to shave my vagina for me last night
Also the girl beside me smells like she's been in a deep fryer.
I just heard a crying baby from out my apartment window and yelled SAME
The best walk of shames are on the highway
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