u know ur drinking tonight lol i dont know why you try to deny it
but i dont wanna get emotional and drunk text
then give me ur phone
NEVER!!
You can spell. I can kill people with no remorse. We all have our skills.
if creeping was an olympic sport, i would be a lock for the gold right now.
Spent $1500 on bottle service and have a lump on my head from hitting the nightstand while puking. Excess? Nooo Success.
I just realized I had sex more when i looked like a fat elton john. Fuck my life.
so I'm in athletic shorts, a suit jacket and I'm still drunk at 6:30am at the last leg of relay for life
my whole body is tingling just thinking about the orgasm hes going to give me
I am so hungover and cant move but craving a Wendys frosty so bad. I might have to watch 2 girls 1 cup just to settle the urge
Oddly enough when I decided to stop whoreing myself out... I lost most of my companionship.
He was sleeping, but the way he was made him look like an adorable, fuzzy penis
That freshman kid successfully snuck into a college party, got caught, proceeded to jump out of a second story window without getting a scratch then met up with us a block away and somehow managed to get a bottle of grey goose in the meantime. He is truly blessed by the alcohol gods
He was wearing an Affliction shirt, a Monster hat, and he asked me for anal within 5 minutes of meeting me. Like 3 strikes and you're out, bro.
Fuckin wine wasted last night. Found my pants in the toilet this morning.
showering high made me realize that i should seriously reconsider my career path... id be a damn good hair shampooer & head massager
congratulations on joining the accidental bisexual club
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