we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
My dad hugged me and said I love u. I'm glad I didn't pull out that night.
You need to stop texting me at SEVEN in the morning. It wakes my one night stands up and makes for the awkward talk way too early.
like if they didnt have tits and vagina, they have no idea how uninteresting to us they would be
You hopped on the counter after puking, and told us you were wearing bare feet and didn't want to be alone.
That point of drunk where you're in a bar bathroom and you're like "F*ck you bra! I'm not taking your sh*t anymore! and you take it off and throw it in a trashcan.
I'm mad at him and disappointed with you. It's like I put a bunch of effort into a PowerPoint of "what not to do with Zach" to show you and the first bullet point was "do not love him" and you're just disregarding all my effort and friendship.
I have to make mistakes myself to learn from them
FUCK YOU I AM MAKING A POWERPOINT
also I woke up naked and covered in water but nobody can explain that part.
I left your tip in your mailbox. Last night was amazing.
I just had sex in the men's bathroom of a Chinese buffet...
YOU ARE MY HERO
You fell in the corner and refused to get up unless someone helped you. And then you crawled under the pool table and took a nap.
He used the ring emoji and we've gone out four times. What is my life.
I may have had several rum punches and then gone to the store and used European cucumbers to prove my baton twirling prowess.
Lost my pants last night. Really need to stop taking shots of whiskey like I'm eating skittles.
Its really hard to take a shit when the dog wont stop trying to crawl into your lap
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