I don't get why Lindsay Lohan doesn't just blame her bad behavior on her twin sister from the Parent Trap. I mean nobodys seen her since.
If it makes you feel any better, karma just served me up a big dose of fuck you.
It's like a squid of pain has attached to my head and it spreading it's whorey tentacles all over.
If you do wifi you would be helping my penis out & real friends care about their friends penises...
I may or may not have had sex last night then sent him home on a bike with two flats
Whatever she smells like compost and feathers.
I believe they call that patchouli.
We're having play-off hate sex for a sport I don't even understand. Go USA!
LESSON OF THE DAY: Saying Everclear gets you out of explaining anything.
my only goal for the semester is never go to my wednesday class sober
Can't beat it when the local bar sends you off with a loaf of bread on the way out the door.
Sorry I twat blocked you earlier I didn't know Sam was over. But, my house my rules, I don't have to knock before I enter. I did see naked butts and smelt "Sex Stank" in the air, we're going to have to set some ground rules when I get home. Hugs and kisses..Mom
She dated an Australian guy or some dude with an accent. Normal guys don't stand a chance.
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED.
Was last night real life? Like did you really light your hair on fire
You told me you could hear my heartbeat through my penis but your methods were unethical.
Sixty five beats a minute. I stand by that.
Maybe those shots of hot dog water wasn’t a good idea after killing a fifth of tequila.. but who’s askin
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