she burped and cried multiple times. it was like i was getting head from a baby.
Nope it's a specific set of cards not like a normal ace, queen king thing....kinda like UNO, but instead of yelling UNO you get shitfaced
I lost my virginity in that bed. You just layed in history.
you were so high that you made a 14 page PowerPoint on why Santa would beat Peter pan in a fight.
and I must say, you were very persuasive
If you're trying to piece together your night, I can tell you where those tassels came from.
IF SOMEONE ASKS YOU IF YOU WANT THE GOOD DRUGS YOU SAY YES.
He sent me a Microsoft outlook meeting request to blow him in the storage room at work. I had to accept.
When you give the bridesmaid toast someday at my wedding I need you to quote Ricky Bobby in some form. And slip in your sister has the vagina of awesomeness. That is all.
Based off the amount of cat hair on my poncho....i stole a cat last night.
You told the entire smokers deck that you were blowing .08 now and anyone else willing later
and than he said 'I did amateur porn for a while' and I just knew tinder did not fail me this time
he walked off and puked in the sand. then he made a sand castle over it so that "it wouldn't upset the kids"
You have a full penis tattoo of a cobra fighting a mongoose, don't you?
I cant promise hot guys but i can promise alcohol which is close enough.
wow. that really looks like a penis. not a top hat
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