So we made editble underwear with fruit roll ups and fruit by the foot
I'm drinking in the hospital parking lot.
My mom is such a hoarder. I found a deer candelabrum last night, it had antlers has candle holders. It was like a redneck menorah.
I dont know if he should be happy or mad about it but he's too big for a blow job.
I envy the lives of milf's kids, the little kid grabs her tits and she just laughs and says not now
Breaking hearts and overdosing on semen. That's my life.
the cops who came hadnt heard yet. when we told them they sang the star spangled banner with us
Although I commend your efforts to keep my penis away from her, your sister is now booty walking up my stairs. Good game though, good game.
I punted my pants across my apt at my roommate last night. Everything else is kinda fuzzy.
had a nice chat with the older gay fellow who works in the bakery at the new vons about vday...we both feel that it's a day of dashed expectations & concerns that we'll have to be cut out of our spanx
I solemnly swear to help bail you out of jail when you throw a dildo at a politician.
I just had sex with the Sheriff's Deputy. You should call me.
Do you think it's illegal to drive without your pants on?
I'm sitting here drinking whisky and listening to The Wiggles, I don't need a social life
Clearly the Stanley Cup Finals good luck hand job IS necessary. You let the whole team down.
Randomize