That bitch is like a bad destiny's child song.
i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
i really wish my pants would only unzip when im sober
I don't want to eat him, he probably tastes terrible.
Do you know many girls there are in gay bars waiting for me to do coke off their tits? A lot.
Tonights theme there is the 7 deadly sins. Greed, envy, sloth, gluttony, sluttiness, fellatio and vodka.
I sat in the bathroom on the counter and gave out advice to all the random people that walked in
I just spent 30 minutes cleaning out my coleman grill. Did you really have to have grilled yogurt?
im just gonna lie here and collect money in this whoppers bag while sprawled out on this bench and explain that its to buy weed for my hangover
I just stood next to my childhood self. Fuck, I'm really stoned...
Yeah. I had to take off my shirt. It's soaked in weakness.
I come from a long history of big boobed German, Swedish, and Irish women. And then there's me. Mother nature was like "Naaaaaaah."
Go have fun. I'm gonna go shower off the regret.
He's a Republican and an Ohio State fan idk how far this can go.
just ran into my father at CVS while buying condoms...he winked at me. I really need to move out of this town.
Randomize
