Stephanie. Problem. I think if I had met Murphy before Ben I would have fucked him instead.
Don't worry about your Murphy feelings. I may have fucked him no matter what.
I thought he was joking about bailing you out until I saw the picture of you and the sheep in the morning paper. Were those my boots you had on it
We may have a problem that even dr. phil cant solve
i have now learned nap means the same thing as sex in college
Just got kicked in the balls by a girl in tap shoes. Fuck EVERYTHING
hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
My porch is a mess of peanut butter and tostitos...thanks for that.
Kinda sad when you get home on a Sunday morning and the paper guy HAND DELIVERS the newspaper to you...,
I will also take that commission in the form of weed. Pass that on to the asst. manager.
Do you think you're physically and mentally capable of killing me? Because I'd really appreciate it.
You came on the chandelier from the first floor.. Of course were allowed back
No, the moral of my Oxford interview was "Never snort caffeine pills".
Well. I mean as excuses for running late go, 'losing track of time in the bathhouse' has gotta be up there on the top ten.
Yeah! Just remind me to. I'll also bring the blow up penis
Rule number 1 of dorm living: do not forget your butt plug in the bathroom.
Randomize
