There are 3 speedbumps now up. Think you can manage the urge to piss on them?
Aw shit! That's like putting me a in a room full of Captiain Crunch Donuts and Jasper Hale and not letting me put my mouth on either.
peeing is so easy when youre drunk. you just tell your body to pee and it pees.
once my pubes got caught on her snaggletooth it was all downhill from there
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
Penises. Penises everywhereeeeeeeee. Penis ratio is sooo disproportionate. I can't NOT get laid tonight.
THIS IS THE EMERGENCY BOOZE SYSTEM. I AM EN ROUTE TO DEWITT WITH A FIFTH OF TEQUILA. THIS IS NOT A TEST
Woke her up in the middle of the night with the smell from a fart. So proud of my colon.
I need more social interactions that don't involve sex
Well, I saw an Olympian's genitals tonight, so it can't be that bad.
I'm a bit offended I got no nudies back but it's whatever
They're in the mail. Snapchats too fast. I want the suspense.
Random question: Have you ever woken up and were suprised to not have a penis?
This is like the first time all week I've properly taken my birth control. My ovaries are so stoked I just know it.
death bed.
death patio
stfu you slept on the patio!?!
Man the amount of drugs being done at a wedding with a bunch of surgeons was disturbing
St. Patty's shenanigans tmrw? I wanna meet dudes lol. Why stop at coronavirus when you can get the clap, too?
Randomize
