Dude WTF? His teammate just started talkin to me on fb! Am I walking around with a "I like to f**k gators" on my forehead?
No, it just says ur easy
This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
Trying to guess which perfume the stripper was wearing based on my bf's clothes
he grabbed my head and said "you are a horse. I am leading you to water" pushed it down and whispered "Drink."
It's like you are the superhero of getting jizzed on
Is it bad of me to apply as a night shift counselor at a boys orphanage purely because of how laid that would get me at bars?
i think dick pics are a sign of a sexual renaissance
Dude. I legit missed class because I got too engrossed in the porn I was watching. Also I need to figure out how to get as flexible as these chicks. Some of the positions they do are outrageous.
the breathalyzer kept saying danger. we made our new slogan danger we need more shots
We just stood there eating chocolate chip pancakes, watching you sleep on the bathroom floor.
I have bad memories with every alcohol but we manage to work through the problems for the good of the relationship
I don't think tits should taste like fish.
Well, I turned down sex again. This is guy #5 in the past 2 weeks. My vagina is going to seek emancipation.
Drunk me says 72 hours of Mexican Viagra and room service.Sober me says we stopped being lovers for a reason after the last lost weekend.
he just kept biting everyone and singing hilary duff songs. i can't even bring him to a gas station.
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