i just saw a foot job.
porn is incredible...
Did the walk of shame past her kids. I'm younger than one of them.
I wanna be on tlc
Impossible. You are neither fat, fertile or fashionless.
I just googled maps his house, and took the virtual tour back to my apartment, just so I could visualize the walk of shame in the morning
I'm drunk. And at a vegan cafe. You would hate it. Don't tell my hipster friend but I kinda hate it too.
He woke me up by trying to shove oreos in my mouth. im ready to go home now
just tried googling 24 hr taco bell and when i typed "24 hour" it autocompleted with fitness. buzzzz killllll
in the middle of fucking he asked me if i had gotten a haircut because he noticed i didnt have split ends anymore. i dont know what to think
Sorry I can't go bowling with you guys. I'm getting daytime dick. That's the best kind.
I don't care if he got kidnapped by a cult one time he is a dick
I vaguely remember losing my underwear to 2 chicks in a bathroom. That drunk.
You're a goddess. Probably of destruction and dick jokes, or some shit, but man, lesser bitches wish they could be half as fab.
I dunno. The drunker I get, the easier econ gets. I may be onto something here.
THE SUN DOESNT SET TIL 647 YAAAAASSSSSSSSSS. Goodbye seasonal depression hello regular depression
She picked a quarter off the floor, kissed it "for luck" and won the $20,000 jackpot. She bought dinner and stayed sober to drive us home. This is a typical example of a visit with my sister.
Randomize
