How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
i learned a valuable lesson last night. sometimes nice girls finish first. twice.
I can handle NPR. I speak hippie. I took it in college.
they started a semi-successful rumor that toby keith died. who says fraternities don't have goals
i mad aa ber float. budweiser nd ice creem. it amzig.
Jesus once told his disciples that its better to hang out with your best friend than give some douche bag a bj.
I feel like somebody ate me, then shit me into my bed.
I just realized I'm the burger in your burger and steak anology. Very disconcerting.
i want to pour hot gravy all over you in bed
lesson learned.. dressing up like a naughty teacher doesn't mean you can get away with spanking a cop with a ruler for being "fresh" with you
it says 'tasty bitch' in sharpie on my tits...
i wasnt laughing because you were puking, i was laughing because three yards away there was a couple seriously getting it on
continuing my moment killer tradition in the best possible way
ok give me a pep talk, I want a hotdog but I'm too stoned to go make it
His wedding band got caught on my nipple ring and that's how I realized he was married
I don’t mind that he’s uncircumcised. It’s the fact that he talks about the Bible immediately after we have sex .
Randomize
