my night went downhill once I lost my bikershorts. EAWSSSSYY ACCESS
I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
don't you miss freshman year when you could get away with "but i've never given a bj before..."
Bitch looked at my dick and said "I thought they called you horsecock, I'm already disappointed"
I told you that line would get her home never said it was a good idea
June 16th my calendar just says boobietassels....I can only assume that has to do with you
The cougar has a calendar on her wall of when she can give topless handjobs again. I pity her husband.
It's like refusing a bong hit from michael phelps... You just can't do it
When you mimic motorboating Jennifer Love Hewitt, is it really that hard to understand why no one thinks you're straight?
I mean, with your nipple problem im surprised. #hangacoatonem
it was also funny because at one point I woke up with my hands tied with a belt and we were both like what the fuck
just passed my midterm while getting a blow job. i love going to school online
If my plane goes down do me a favor. Break into my house and get the batman costume and swing out of my bedroom.
I woke up and there is a small Irish man playing call of duty in my room. Discuss.
I shaved my asshole for this. That's real dedication.
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