How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
I realized courtney is my jiminy cricket but instead of preventing me from telling lies she prevents me from fucking strangers
just scratched off #34 on my list of things to do before age 30 - drunk in a helicopter.
I was dancing barefoot on glass at one point. That really sobered me up.
She told me to stuff her like a turkey. She actually yelled happy thanksgiving.
There's a certain level of slut that i can handle.... I think she just broke that scale
Everything tastes like Lysol. Am I dying?
he stopped during sex, told me i smelled like McDonald's and went harder..
Totally passed out on the dealers bed after paying him all in ones so no, i dont think i'll be getting a discount soon.
Hi I am too sober and out of rum. Translation: I owe you some beer. Also, get better taste in beer.
Well we went from the roof to the stairwell to an air mattres. One day were going to fuck in a bed
You know how I know last night was a good night? Because I remember high fiving a couple WHILE they were having sex.
Beyoncé wouldn't let anything bad happen here
she's my really slutty friend i bring around so i can act slutty and not feel as bad about it
I had a dream that you were telling me how good you are at parkour and legit you were doing it just like Michael Scott...
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