no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
Don't threaten to terrorize my ass hole unless you have to wherewithal to back it up
come home now. i got a twizzler tangled in my hair again
How do I tell if what I'm covered in is pee or cum?
Whatever. I'll let someone else deal with his flacid penis.
Why hello there Olivia! How are you today on this fine and most wonderful morning full of magic and adventure and awesomeness?
Someone just got laid.
I keep hearing lesbian porn and I'm the only one home. I don't think this is healthy
please tell me why my pillow is wearing your thong...
...i wondered where i left that...
There are too many people and smells in this elevator for my hangover to handle.
Totally sleeping on a bloodstained mattress tonight. I love life's little adventures.
They're tearing apart the house I lost my virginity in:(
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
I'll give you another blowjob if you bring me some cake.
Was it a bad idea to have spent all of my tax return on coke?
Randomize
