i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
I've slept with so many tools that you'd think my pussy was Home Depot.
apparently the officer said last night, "son, why don't you do yourself a favor and spread your legs so you don't keep vomiting on them". why can't I remember those nights?!
Everyone is in jail. I'll see what i can do though
how do i say "thank you for the blowjob, but never talk to me again" without crushing her?
There's a wake for a coworker on 420 during te time of 420... Hoping everyone will be too sad to notice how high I am.
Lil wasted at a baby shower. Here's to beating teen pregnancy BOTTOMS UP
Just had my ass outlined on a bar top with permanent marker and then they carved the imprint into the wood with a knife. I'm famous in the country!
it's gotten to the point where there are no existing good choices. even our good choices are bad choice by anyone's standards but ours.
just filed my taxes drunk as balls. i may be going to jail.
Bake him heart shaped cookies?!? Send him a picture of your tits like an ADULT!
Teaching my class, used paper clips to fix my hair. Too hungover to be a kindergarten teacher.
I didn't think I was even that high but when we were standing in the cop car's headlights I totally forgot how to use my arms
This is like a walk of shame down memory lane.
i think we sleep fucked last night...
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