the only plus side is that now I'll be able to tell my son not to trust the condoms that his college gives away..........
this is never going to happen for me, I think he thinks I'm crazy
well you did scream "PLEASE! I'LL S YOUR D IN FRONT OF EVERYONE"
Just got a birthday card from Camel. How am I supposed to stop smoking when they care?
Aside from the fact that there's a penis in my mouth, that's a pretty good picture of me
Listen. I'm a changed woman. I have no problem using him for sex.
Just saw him riding in a basket on the front of a bike trying to feed the other guy beer. He screamed 'PARTY BIKE BITCHES!' at me as they rode past.
I lied. He's hitting on a drag queen now. Should I rescue him or take pictures?
Until you wake up with a Hustler club stripper in the next room whose nipple you were coerced to lick at Snake & Jake's after breaking up a fight between an Indian and a Filipino, I don't wanna hear about your weird.
im that hungover where parking at red lights has to be done
We had a weird moment. Mid-sex he started talking. It went along the lines of "I. FUCKING. LOVE.....this condom..."
Tonight just try not to threaten to pee on the hot guys buying us drinks....please..
I got Pilsbury cinnamon rolls for us to have tomorrow, but I don't have the willpower to leave them in my fridge overnight, so I am eating them all and getting us more in the morning
I love you more by the minute
Surely the maintenance men have seen worse than that condom right
I know. It was just so disappointing. I almost made it. And now the "when's the last time you peed your pants" clock has restarted. Lol
The Easter sex puns were too abundant
i out mim tonsoeep
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