Some girl just toasted to friendship and love. I want to break her neck.
okay serious question, the water is shut off in your house, do you attempt and use the clean toilet water for your new bong?
how much land on farmville do you have now? i sold all my shit to make room i need more money... these animals need to know I'm running a business not a charity.
it was literally the size of a crayloa marker. i didnt know what to do with it so i just sat there
In chronological order you drank, sang, smoked, napped, threw up, cried, laughed, described your pubic area, passed out. You have abused the privilege to use me as your D.D.
Well I consider my vagina a dear friend. She treats me good I treat her good. We work together. Glad we could be of service.
It was that same situation where "cuddling on the floor" was actually just code for "rough shameful hate sex" hahaha.
Well, on the plus side, the hospital gave me a shirt that says "Makes a bad ass look good"
You can't spell "party" without "RA."
You know what else you can't spell it without? "Gonna get fired."
You don't want to cheat on your husband, you just want to fuck someone who isn't him.
He either works for the Irish Mob or I'm being Catfished
She needs to go. She is like the Yoko Ono of our group.
Don't know why you're always hating on relationships. I've had chocolate pancakes accompanied by a blowjob and a blunt and it's not even 9 am. Time for mid morning shower sex. Enjoy your morning bong bowl alone asshole
We also had a full on debate about how realistic and useful teleportation and time travel would be...and only used Twilight Zone episodes as "scientific evidence"
YOU WILL DIE AND I WILL CARVE 'I TOLD YOU SO' ON YOUR HEADSTONE
Randomize
