please stop taking shits in my toilet and leaving them there.
I haven't been this sober since birth.
this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
or how I got to mom's but there is vomit on my shoes. I never thought i'd be recapping with her.
I've hooked up with 3 different guys already this week...don't tell me I haven't been a productive member of society
They broke our car window and then wrote "great night" on the next
Awee what are you going to name your new dog?
What dog?
He left in the middle of the night, he left his shoes behind and stole my doc martens..size 6 female. Wtf?
Just described you as looking like "a very cute escapee from an Egyptian insane asylum"
Went into Walmart to get a pregnancy test. Came out with a beta fish and chocolate.
I was in a penguin suit. Dick out. I am confident in the value of my pic.
Can I put tequila in the fish bowl? I think he wants to party too
I never said it was inaccurate, I said I hate you.
literally who communicates this much post-hookup why r u like this
Randomize
