how do I tell the students with a crush on me, that yes, I am open to receiving blowjobs in exchange for grades?
i think there mostly mad about the fact it was 6 pm not the fact i blew a .255
i just got drunk dialed and its 10am. clearly finals are over.
we just got kicked out of the mexican restaurant. i have a full pitcher of margarita's hiding under my coat.
Recent Google searches: "babu kangarooz"... "why 2 tacos bell" and "is dinosaur in real life"
He was a bulldog and my face was like rare meat. Never again with the drunken ones.
Please tell me there isn't another video of me on the toilet...
Well apparently I decided it was easier I piss in the trash can at waffle house than In the toilet. Would've been ok if the trash can was in the bathroom.
We split an eighth of shrooms and went ice fishing. It didn't get weird until I caught one and we both started crying.
I can't even express how horny I am. The English language isn't equipped for what I'm plotting.
This guy is trying to get me to do some acrobatic gymnast shit just so he can see "my tight hole." I'm too big to be sweating in my own damn bed. Shittttt.
WHAT IF I SAT OUTSIDE AND STARTED SCREAMING THE LYRICS TO O CANADA WOULD THAT FIX IT
PLEASE DON'T
I woke up next to my bosses toilet.i wish you had just left me in the neighbors yard.
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
well that was a fail
maybe for you, but i got a free ice cube in my bra
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