why did u let me go home with him last night?
u were determined it was a good idea
girls just need to accept the fact that i'm going to make out with their boyfriends
he asked me to eat out his asshole. after five minutes of uncomfortable staring i realized he was serious.
I was passed out on the couch, she literally cut my boxers off with a 8" chef's knife and had her way with me.
I just won 10 dollars from out chugging the bar tender and I found out that the baby aint mine in the last hour. I don't even care if l get laid tonight any more.
As much as I'm all for laying on his living room couch, watching spongebob and having spoon sex, it's becoming a routine.
I enjoyed our heart to heart in the trunk on the way to the stripclub
Your excessive judging is making this uncomfortable
I am 100% planning on being drunk on Wednesday. This is America. Work or no work.
how do you expect me to pass the time when I'm too old to be jailbait but too young to legally drink
Sadly, she's the porn star that got away
I stirred my drink with a butcher knife. His roomate keeps giving me dirty looks
Like what do you want from me
Seriously dude...who threw up on Michelle? She's been crying for like an hour
Don't date the locals. They're all tainted.
If you dont get laid dressed as Woody Harrelson in Zombieland, I have lost all faith in the men of nw Indiana.
Randomize
