Joe is a total sociopath, I'm going to hook up with him tonight
So then I sent a pic msg of the Magnum XL box to her friend
Forgot that I saved my paper as "Eat Shit Edwards" and e-mailed it because I missed class. I'm sure Prof. Edwards will be delighted when she gets it. I don't anticipate a passing grade.
We decided to smoke and then made crosses on our foreheads for ash wednesday
mom would be proud
Saying he's good in bed would be like saying Soulja Boy is a good rapper, completely unlogical if you've heard him.
You kept making that girl eat peanuts, saying they were good for her baby..... I don't think she pregnant
She just hopped out of the car at a red light to pet the baby Jesus in the nativity scene.
Not worth it.
ive penciled you in for a day of excessive drinking
I don't think she considers it a date unless she publicly urinates
You did profess your love for cotton multiple times and your hatred for all other fabrics
I woke up naked except for someone else's socks. Im so proud
We're having play-off hate sex for a sport I don't even understand. Go USA!
I seriously want to say to him "Do you know how many blow jobs you could have gotten this summer?"
A stoners worse nightmare? Well packaged snacks. Just took me 5 mins to get a cinnamon roll out of the package. And another 3 mins to properly type this text
yeah i wanted to show him what i was missing, so i decided to send him a seductive picture, like the ones where the girls are eating strawberries and whipped cream. well i didn't have those, so i sent him a picture of myself naked eating a bagel
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