I've been thinking and really it's a miracle I haven't had an STD yet.
The ratio was 19 to 1 and the 1 was lauren so it didn't even count.
this is like black Friday for my dealer. I'm literally standing in line.
I said i love rain, just to change the subject, and he said 'id like to do it in the rain'. Dear lord. He doesnt stop
Uh, also, Rob told me he felt bad for choking you.
turkey basters and jungle juice, is that really the whole shopping list for new year's?
Help. Me. He just whispered 'prepare yourself', & sprayed hairspray everywheres to make sure the 'air was crisp'
At some point i could of swore that you were in my bedroom riding a manatee last night..... I like my new dealer
Sometimes you just have to have sex for a Netflix password.
Nope, had to pee on the side got violated by tall grass. Then someone came around the corner and I had to stop mid pee to dive into the car.. Pants down
Sometimes I really think that if... When your stoned you have a catlike ability to just relax in any position
I have never encountered a chode in the wild
I feel like dick that good should always be within a five kilometre radius of me.
After my shift today I'm going on a bender. Not saying this so you'll stop me, just a heads up to invest in Tylenol, Gatorade, and Jack
How is it possible for someone who gets so many dick picks sent to her, to be experiencing such a complete and utter lack of dick IRL.
Randomize
