apparently i started the naked brigade. and depantsed everyone who wasn't naked. her parents must hate me.
I was just handed a mimosa the size of my head. Stay tuned.
you should give me head with plastic fangs in
It took us hanging out like four times to kiss. Id like to fuck you before I'm 30
well i fell out of the hot tub and tumbled down the hill and kicked a plant in the process.
No, he's ok. He just broke his teeth on the stripper pole. No biggie.
There's a person in my phone named motor boat. I love making new friends.
NEW INFORMATION meech found me passed out on a bench outside.
My sharpie cut off line was invaded last night. Where's my turtleneck?
I look like a bag of dicks so if you could ugly yourself up that'd be great.
Is the Chairman of the College Republicans throwing upon your toilet right now? 'Murica!
apparently while i was high i thought that putting a dinosaur temporary tattoo on my inner thigh would keep me from taking my pants off and having sex with him...
...it didn't...
sorry for running off in the middle of that heart to heart. free food.
Oh god...Did I just fuck a sugar granddaddy?!
she squeaked mid orgaism. I laughed she cried
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