Bel-fucking-mar, this place has more popped collars than a Hollister catalog
hah yeah. there was a kid puking in the bathroom and this idiot brings in a potted plant and was like "yeah he's like, not getting enough oxygen"
Haha its ok. When we got back you sat in the car and attempted to tell me in sign language you were blacked out lol
The Ex's are trying to talk to the GF. Game face bro.
He didn't dress up but kept finding random pieces of costumes on the floor at each club. He was an 80s hair band warrior at the end of the night.
Licking pop rocks off a stranger's washboard abs and kissing strangers young enough to be my kid. Yeah, it was THAT kind of party last night
We got naked and peed in the garden. Something about bonding with our new house
I assume some self respect is too lofty of a gift idea
Flatmate got laid for the first time in 3 years. I'm baking a cake.
On a completely different note: my hookup and i are now in a semester GPA competition. Winner gets froyo and sexual favors. School just got interesting.....
I can't wait to get to LA so I can punch her in the face
Serious question, on a scale of go for it to what the fuck are you thinking, what's me going to a monk or any religious official and saying "baptize me daddy" in a serious voice?
SPICY FOODS AND BLOWJOBS DON'T MIX.
YOU SAID YOU'D TRY ANYTHING ONCE YOU LIAR
This time tomorrow I will be drunk and in a voodoo shop
I share a birthday weekend with Easter this year, so that fucking sucks. I hate sharing...and I have to share with fucking Jesus this year.\n
Randomize
