Who has a tranny cab driver? I have a tranny cab driver.
everything was goin great until he pulled out his ed hardy lighter and smoked in my face like he was cool.
it's like you attract all the douchebags that nobody wants. people should thank you.
Can we just schedule bi-weekly fucks and bypass all the bullshit?
i study at coffee shops because all these damn artsy people motivate me to work towards a real job.
i took it, then realized you live 3 ours away. but if you start driving now, im almost positive I'll still be hard
On a side note I think I burnt my eyebrow when we "teter-totered" into the fire
Between the booze, mechanical bulls, and penis's I think my body hates it when I'm single
you flashed my boyfriend last night so i tackled you to the floor. you may be a bit sore.
Well after the shots I danced with a homeless guy, split my toe on broken glass, and had a 20 piece mcnugget. Who says postgrad life is boring.
Is it bad that I recognize every dick in your dic pic collection?
Well, I guess you are not meant to have this fucking picture of an adorable baby duck.
Btw I did not technically have a dick in me but I was naked in bed with a man during the last finals game so that is why the Warriors won
if i ever get to the point where i am moaning when i pee, please do the honorable thing and kill me.
Sometimes I just take my boobs out of my shirt so they can get some fresh air
I snuck a teenager into a club last nite, I felt like such a criminal. It was Awsome
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