did not feel like going to store to get condoms last night so went to her pantry and got a sandwich bag and a rubberband
did it work?
nope
Sometimes I wish there were a little bird hiding that would periodically go, "creep-per."
yeah so our basement was flooded 4 feet. we just smoke and drank and then went swimming. gotta make the best out of it
i feel like verizon should give a sexter of the month award
Her mom walked into the garage as we were smoking a kush blunt with sombreros on.
Dude, she found the red hair dye from 4th of July. then she proceeded to give you a red mohawk for a more patriotic thanksgiving eve. How do you not remember that?
I'm that hungover student in class ... On a wednesday morning
Omg I think I'm in the wrong class
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
It was that same situation where "cuddling on the floor" was actually just code for "rough shameful hate sex" hahaha.
You know how I've been hooking up with my ex? Well he told me he loved me and I said I was just there for sex so let's get it done. He looked sad, but he did it anyways. And life was good again.
I threw away my jacket instead of washing it, the jungle juice stained me more of shame than red food coloring... i have never been that white girl wasted before...
she came back from her house with A paper cut , a 2liter of sprite with Bacardi , and half a mustache . we're inviting her more ofte
I don't have time to shower before my passport photos...your cum is all over my hair...that's with me for 10 years now
When she says 'Polish hangover cure' she just means more vodka. Don't do it.
You burped in your shoe and whispered 'you're mine now'
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