don't worry, i have a range rover and a brother hopped up on steroids.. we can solve this little misunderstanding quite easily.
For future reference, a lint roller appears to be the easiest way to get glitter out of a beard.
I just called my cat a slut and she responded. Proudest moment ever.
Good news.. I found out what I did Saturday night. Bad news... I found out what I did Saturday night.
asked the girl next to us on line to take a picture of us and she shared her bacardi. i love white people.
This morning two of his housemate threw confetti over me, started singing and handed me a make shift trophy out of cereal boxes and beer cans that said 'Harry's Virginity' on it. Fucking brilliant!
Well I went on a freakin rampage and destroyed a fan and claimed that it wasn't doing its fan duties... Then I knocked on everybody's doors in the hall and asked if they were content with their fan's performance and if not I would take care of it...
You me handle of captain and a sorostitute study sesh, if we don't get laid mancards must be relinquished
That hot guy i showed you guessed my exact bra size. I want to have his tan babies.
I told my coworker that I'm going to a dinner party and was asked to bring wine and pregnancy tests and he was like.. I miss being 20
He just said Bill Nye is just a dude. If I ever considered sleeping with him, I never will now.
You just kept looking down at your tits and screaming "I LOVE YOU TWO!!!"
Sorry you ended up in detox. It's not my fault you decided to walk downtown in only your underwater at 3am. I think the tequila took over.
She said my penis was powerful and magnificent
you were making out with a girl because you told her you were part of Nsync
Randomize
