He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
There isn't a single transaction on my online bank account that doesn't involve drugs or alcohol since November 12
hows that letter of apology to the waitress at waffle house coming?
It's like, I'm the official vagina for that DJ group
Well yes but because of that incident i now salute to truck drivers
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE ASSHOLE WHO BREAKS OUT THE SHOTS
I went online and donated $30 to his walk-a-thon as a "sorry I puked in your bed last night"
THIS IS NO TIME FOR SHAME JOSH. JUST GOTTA GET IT IN. PURELY FOR LEVELING UP PURPOSES
The cab driver gave me a church card yesterday and said I should reconnect with god.
Then he gave me 2 tickets to a movie he's going to be in
Signs you do Molly too much. Glow sticks fallout of random articles of clothing on academic row
who is the naked dude on the coffee table
thats jeff, jeff is nice so don't be rude
I need to wash the frat house off of me
EVERYBODY CALM YOUR SHIT
I just woke up and my ass is covered in honey and my eye brows are shaved off.
Judging from the sharpie on my face, glitter on my chest and women's tiger print panties i'm wearing last night was a thing.
Randomize
