There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
I actually just cleaned easy glide lube off my desk. My life has gone way down hill since I met you.
i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
I seriously fake cumming more than i poop.
I was relieved after I found the unopened condom in my pocket. Then I found the open one in the other pocket..
It would be one hovered percent delicioui
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
Dude this stripper just dry humped the settings off my phone. She earned that dollar
hahaha lucky. I'm fishing with some dude I just met when I woke up next to the mohawk river
Rolled in at 3:30am from the strip club, with all the screaming I did, Siri doesn't even recognize my voice this morning,
after attempting to eat a candy cane bigger than my hand i have determined there's no way to eat this that doesn't seem erotic
SShout out to Barney the Dinosaur for teaching me how to sing the ABCs backward. I just scored a free pitcher.
We had sex while watching the republican debate. I'm not sure how he maintained an erection watching Donald Trump speak.
Just laying in bed, snuggling my cat, and pondering whether I'd like to attend a swingers party this evening...
Sorry about kicking you last night but you don’t mess with a girls margarita bucket. Ever
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