i messed up with two guys last night...one i pranked and left the phone on..the other one i went crazy on trying to be his girlfriend after four jagermeister shots...
ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
I literally sat down and peed with my underwear still on. How does that happen?
You know... If I put the same amount of effort into school as I put into giving women orgasms I would be a Rhodes scholar
I think I should advise against you hooking up with a guy that throws "the shocker" up in all of his pictures on facebook. Just sayin.
The US State Dept doesn't need to know I'm a high strung drunken whore.
I told you all we needed steroids to survive the tour de franzia, like the bikers. But nobody listened...
I was like a damn cattle dog, I separated all the sheep, I can wing man for anyone on this campus.
well if they don't get here soon...no fuck it, I'm going to the strip club.
Nobody will take a lit match to your nipple without warning you this time. Pinky swear.
He also reminds me slightly of a pirate which i find strangely attractive
Last night I had a sex dream about Trudeau, he hasn't even been prime minister for 24 hours
It's okay. I think we're back on. I just went on a dog walk with him n blew him on a sidewalk
My intervention, when it happens, should have vanilla cake....buttermilk icing.
After 8 hours of circus trick sex, his parents are both hugging me and kissing me on the cheek asking when I'm coming back over. Score?
Randomize
