"Ever since I killed her kid she be actin' shady." Actual quote overheard at Marine World just now. Oh God.
I have one thing to say: spongebath.
I wish that wasn't all you had to say. And by that, I mean I wish you hadn't said that at all.
Whenever I miss you I just turn on Tool Academy
I'm taking this break up pretty rough.. I've never been to sad to masturbate.
Don't be alarmed at the girl laying on your bathroom floor.
Totally just sport flirted the shit out of a girl on a wheelchair. I've done my good deed for the day.
Just a heads up, i'm sleeping in te back seat of your car so don't be freaked out when you see me in the A.M.
I woke up with the suicide hotline number saved as 'Hot Guy Josh'
I just had nipple jewelry returned to me in the law library.
Is it a bad thing that I'm trimming my nose hairs in anticipation for the 8ball to be delivered?
Remember that time you puked in a beer pong cup while someone else was playing?
that happened
ATTENTION PENIS' OF BURLINGTON: I AM COMING FOR YOU
This is the beginning of the end. Testicle Tuesdays and free ball Friday are going to scar people for life
Dude that picute of your balls will haunt my nightmares
What do you mean? Just eat his food and have sex with him. Unless you want a relationship, then just eat his food.
whatever. i just wanna get "forget my own name" wasted
no. you need to know your name so people know where to return you when you get lost.
Randomize
