i was born a porn star she said
My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
just heard 2 nerds making fun of a girl for mispronouncing stochiometry. they followed it up by discussing the mathematical equation for getting laid. my day just became 100x better.
I'm out of vodka and money. My semester is officially over. The way I see it, my finals are just forms I need to fill out in order to leave campus.
We got the idea to smoke under his bed because, and I quote, "it'd be just like going camping"
You working tonight?
Keg. Hottub. Wearimnh a 8th graders bikini. Mess
library dates and plan B? He is looking like a great catch.
One huge ass giant mistake followed by celebatory shots and coors lights thats my day in a nut shell
Did you shave a certain someone in his sleep last night?
I'm like 80% sure we nearly got arrested because we threw fireworks at a car
I mean honestly, I love naps like Anthony Weiner loves sending dick pics
Just seen a chubby version of you. Nearly kidnapped her. Perfect woman
Girl in my public speaking class just gave a speech on weaves, God I love community college
I'm 4,715,723% sure I don't give a fuck.
Same way I cope with everything else. With dildos, dunkin and depeche mode
Randomize
