Christians are straight up FREAKS
hey got me stoned for the first time when i was 14. there is no bond stronger
she named each of the players on the last ten madden covers in order and then shotgunned 2 beers...if she doesnt have a penis im in love
the lady next to me just sniffed my hair, smiled, and then fell asleep. I almost started crying from that kind of creepiness
don't cry, we can learn from her
I just found a plastic cup with panties inside of it. Let's play CSI.
It's called "lets see how many European capitals we can do the walk of shame through in one year"
My dad, when he got home and saw me loading a bowl in the living room: "We have TWO beautiful balconies to get high on and you pick the couch?!"
Yea we just broke up
so do we start sexting now or later?
You declared your undying love to a drag queen, then proceeded to puke into the poor man's purse.
Don't send me heart emojis when you're jacking off.
I'm high and having a granola buffet this has got to be the healthiest I have ever been
I'm not finished with being a sloppy white girl alcoholic. I didn't postpone having a husband and kids for sober weekends.
Just reintroduced tequila back into my life...so that's happening
YAS SHES BACK AND BETTER THAN EVER
Don't tell me you're on acid again
No. I don't like you. I like your penis. Chin up. At least I like part of you.
Randomize
