There's a woman here that looks like a cross between Michael Jackson and Flipper.
Walk of shame was bad enough, but farting with each step as I walked past his roommates was just not cosmically fair.
So when we opened his headboard we found a bottle of crisco sitting on top of his porn magazines.
I guess we all know what he was cookin.
She asked the class if starwars was based on a true story...
Look at the bright side...I have an 11 inch penis
What happened to chicks over dicks?
That rule does not apply to 9 inch dicks..
Can you send me the video of that girl that got arrested last night? I'm gonna try and hit that and I need something to break the ice with.
At one point in time, he cried and said I didn't appreciate him.
Sounds like sex on a twister board.
An idea that is both hilarious and intriguing...
My dad is so drunk he attempted to ride my two year old cousin's tricycle. For a solid five minutes.
Well I met my booty call's parents by accident, so that happened.
Pretty sure my boner drove me home. Like it didn't just do the steering it was the gas and brake too..
I woke up to both of you drawing on me in sharpie, unless a glorious threesome was had the night before that is not okay.
Who says it wasn't?
I'm taking the day off so I can get drunk at Whole Foods before noon
Dude I turned down free booze. I think I'm growing as a person.
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