the vacuum is drunk
what?
i spilled my drink and tried to vacuum it and now the vacuum is drunk
Broke my phone, have no voice AND I was blackout by 3 p.m...I'm betting I had a great time.
I shaved my pubes to make my cock look like it has a lions mane. to surprise the girl that works at the zoo when she comes over.
When he was fingering me, it felt/looked like he was digging around for pocket change.
she peed on how many people?
The problem with having your drunkeness documented at a wedding is not only does it show up all over facebook, but all over professional photography websites.
I Never golf you the sypdu of andrew. The one o will marry. The one j plwgded my last breath up. The one I pledged everything I live forbworh to. I love him more than life itself
i just bought plan b at the bus station. happy holidays and welcome to a new level of white trashiness.
All I could think of during that funeral was how great I look in a suit, how creepy catholics are, and how horny I am.
Please just fuck her. She's new to LA and doesn't know anyone nice.
I'm going through a really dark time right now
I don't want to hear it man. I just jerked it to a pic of my ex wife in a bikini. Buck up
I forgot I did whipits. Probably because my brain cells were killed from the whipits
These tits shall not be calmed
I just said "you do you" to my penis.
Look idk the rules and regulations of our freindship...but I need you to carry me to my car.
Randomize
