Goal for tonight: Make one last drunken mistake for the semester.
Mental note: adding peach schnapps to a gin and tonic does not "water it down."
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
You have to figure out where to put this turtle dude
hey sorry if you felt me holding your hand in the middle of the night I was actually just checking if you had a pulse
We can just keep having sex until one of us finds someone we actually like
If we order a pizza and I contribute 9 cents, is that fair?
May or may not have just put tequila in my special "kids+" orange juice fortified with vitamins a, b, c, d, e, and now t.
he taught all the little kids to ski. it was stupid hot. i'm pretty sure my ovaries exploded.
In the morning he said my plan to make 2 casseroles today was, "hot in a grandma sort of way," & I didn't think it was weird. THAT'S how hot he was.
You woke us up at 9:15 am still in your toga from last night saying "welcome to my house party...party". You had already filled up the pong cups with yaager/fireball and ordered a chicken platter... Who even delivered that that early???
Nothing but goodness could come from two friends getting naked. Think of all the good advice and other things we could give to each other.
So I've reached a new low. After completing my walk of shame and being told "see you around", I took off my heels to discover he had came in my shoe.
I hope you know, that by sending me a cat meme back, you've entered in a cat picture battle; which never has an end in sight.
The duel has begun.
welp, we watched the human centipede high last night and my mind literally shut down, when i came to all i could hear was mel saying EAT EAT HIS SHIT
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