Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
oh jesus shes a lukewarm mess
he was so high that he wouldn't speak to anybody for like 30 minutes, he'd only gobble, like a turkey.
good news. according to wikipedia, my blackout might just have been "post-trauma amnesia"
Well I'm just gonna sit here naked in this chair and whatever happens happens
On a scale of one to america, how free are you this weekend?
I just wanna be craddled in his arms and spoon fed applesauce..
that's the most romantic thing you've ever said.
So... Apparently, "Home" isn't the correct response when a cop asks for your address...
I never should have let my cousin and his pregnant girlfriend move in with me. I'm never having sex again. They scare off men more than 'my dream wedding' pin board.
Unless you're gonna start buying my underwear, you have got to stop ripping it off of me.
If I win the contest of drinking the most water I get a chicken nugget.
I don't know what weirder, the fact that I flat out said "I thought I deleted you from facebook" or that she responded with "I just hacked your account and readded myself". Never thought I'd say this but I wish drunk me would stop making friends!
Of the past 48 hours, 46 of them have been spent naked. I'd say it's been a good two days.
Have you ever just sat there and thought about past penises?
with the way the semester is going, being a stripper is starting to sound better and better everyday
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