I feel like I am becoming dumber sitting here in class than I would be sitting on the couch smoking weed.
Everybody was literally kung fu fighting
I know it is almost summer when the students in my night class start showing up drunk.
i was about to rearrange the room but realized that this is the only efficient setup where we can have sex while the other one's asleep without them accidentally seeing.
you should be careful. everyone knows your chances of pregnancy increase by 100 percent when youre the daughter of a religious figure
P.S. It's common courtesy to let the girl your banging know if she's about to walk into the same place your girlfriend is at so she can get her poker face ready
Excuse me hold on, hooking up with someone who is verified on twitter is like being important.
So far today I've found 3.5 million dollars in savings. Pretty sure management is gonna start buying me hookers if getting laid has this much payoff
So your contact has been changed to "jizz weave" in my phone. Now, as strange and random as that may be, I'm slightly embarrassed to say that I have more than one contact that fits that description so please identify yourself.
I mean jail does seem alright, all the free broth you can eat.
So I bet a guy he could drink two irish car bombs faster than me and I lost. now he gets to name our first son. sory.
She posted a pic of her bf on ig wishing him a happy bday at midnight. She then proceeded to have sex with me. Who is the bday boy again?
Plus who wants to live somewhere tom jerked off? No one.
There's always a silver lining when massive voluptuous tits are involved
Is it awkward to pay for your boob job with scholarship money? Either way, it's happening.
Randomize
